Matthew Wiener makes me laugh. He is really smart director with a lot going on in his head, and sometimes when he wants us to pick up a scene from a particular line, he paraphrases that line from the script. It is one of his little quirks and it can be hilarious. I have recorded for posterity just a few of his adorable misquotes (with his blessing). Below I have quoted the ACTUAL line from the script followed Matthew’s version. Enjoy!
Script: “Your pictures are beautiful.”
MW: “I love your polaroids.”
Script: “Who could possibly love her more than I do?”
MW: “Who could possibly love me as much as I love me?”
Script: “I wish you had let us help. The magazine could’ve pulled a few strings.”
MW: “You should’ve let the newspaper help you. The newspaper boys could have carried her down the runway.”
Script: “…a good barometer for the political climate of their day?”
MW: “A good barometer for apples.”
Script: “I guess you can say I’m into events, too. Wars, famines, genocide…”
MW: “I’m into events, too. Garbage, gingivitis…”
Script: “Oh, I almost forgot… They wanted me to give you this.”
MW: “Oh, look what I found in my pocket.”
Script: “Sleeping on Richard’s sofa can’t be as comfy as all that…”
MW: “Richard’s couch can’t be tasty.”
Script: “[She has] One kid. A son. Twelve years old.”
MW: “I have a ten year old son.”
Script: “Hey!” “Hey!”
MW: “Hey, Hey, we’re the Monkeys.”
Script: “You talk out of both sides of your mouth, you know that?!”
MW: “You talk out of both sides of your mouth. You’re a mouth talker!”
Script: “Days of Wine and Roses. Blake Edwards. 1962.”
MW: “Guns & Roses.”
Script: “I never thought I’d have to compete with a dead man.”
MW: “I never thought I’d have to fight a dead man.”
Script: “I’m afraid to ask: Is she a grown-up?”
MW: “I’m afraid to ask: Does she have her driver’s license? Is she old enough to buy liquor? Cigarettes? Can she get a tattoo?”
AND MY PERSONAL FAVORITE…
Script: “I just want to be comfortable, does that make me a bad person?”
MW: “I just want to be comfortable, does that make me a diabetic?”
Time Stands Still runs May 12-27. Please join us!
